Star Wars

Two disciples, one bearded and the other fat, are floating in the air and rising upwards!

Fat Disciple (surprised): Oh no, Seyyed! Why are we floating upwards? Did we take something?

Bearded Disciple: I don’t think so, bro! We were supposed to go to space when I come to your place tonight!

Fat Disciple: We didn’t even have any drinks!

Bearded Disciple: Maybe Israel messed with us?

Fat Disciple: Nah, I didn’t feel anything!

Cut to inside a spaceship.

Bearded Disciple (worried): Bro, I think the aliens kidnapped us!

Fat Disciple (turns to Bearded Disciple): Shut up, let me try to communicate with them! (Turns to alien) Hello… how are you? Good weather?

Alien (normal man’s voice): We’ve come from another galaxy to get to know the beings of your planet!

Fat Disciple: Well, you made a mistake. We’re trying to get rid of half the countries of the world ourselves! They’re so dangerous!

Alien: Really? Well, we can destroy them!

Bearded Disciple: Awesome! Can you destroy America right now?

Alien: Sure! Just tell me where it is on your planet!

Bearded Disciple: Bro, where’s America on the map?

Fat Disciple: It’s west of England. And England is south of Africa!

Alien: Got it. I’ll take care of it right now.

Cut to:

Bearded Disciple: Oh no! Why did you hit South America instead?!

Fat Disciple: Damn it! Ahmadinejad, didn’t you say England is south of Africa?

Bearded Disciple: No, listen! America is a superpower with nuclear missiles!

Fat Disciple: What superpower? Nah, their power is weak. What’s a superpower anyway?

Bearded Disciple: Yeah, you’re right, just a poor country with a few nuclear missiles.

Cut to:

Bearded Disciple: You messed up again! You just wiped out North Korea!

Alien: Well, your description matched that part of Earth!

Fat Disciple:** Let me explain it! America is a country with nuclear power. It oppresses its people, threatens the world, and is a disaster for everyone.

Alien: Now I understand what you’re talking about!

Cut to:

Bearded Disciple (shocked): Why did you pulverize Putin and Russia?!

Fat Disciple (angry): Come on! Why are you messing up? Look, in America, they don’t respect women at all. They just objectify them. Every man has multiple partners. They imprison students, throw professors in jail…

Alien: Oh, I get it now!

Fat Disciple: You idiot! You wiped out half the Middle East!

Bearded Disciple:** Why are you aiming right and hitting left? And then they criticize our missiles! Amateurs!

Fat Disciple: You know what? Forget it. Just blow up the whole thing and let’s be done with it!

Bearded Disciple:** Seriously, I’ve never seen such a clueless alien.

The whole Earth is destroyed.

Narration: And that’s how, after the destruction of Earth, life continued in a different form in another part of space.

Final image: a mix of the disciples and aliens showing similar behaviors.

The creator: Vahid Nikgoo

Produced by CheezMeeza